Pharmacy2 - SONIC VOODOO BAND

BUYAGRA: Stimulant to be taken prior to shopping. Increases potency and duration of spending spree.

MENICILLIN: Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to Latin heartthrobs.

ST. MOM'S WORT: Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering pre-schoolers unconscious for up to six hours.

EMPTY NESTROGEN: Highly effective supplement that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.

PEPTO-BIMBO: Liquid silicone for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and improves flirting.

DUMMEROL: When taken with Pepto-bimbo, can cause lowering of IQ, causing enjoyment of loud country music and cheap beer.

FLIPITOR: Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.

JACKASSPIRIN: Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary, or phone number.

ANTI-TALKSIDENT: A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers.

RAGAMET: When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation as nagging on him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself.

DAMITOL: Take two and the rest of the world can go to hell for 8 hours!

No. He isn’t extraordinary. He is simply a man and no more, and is subject to all the fears and all the cowardices and the timidity that any other man is subject to. Given a few more days, I have a very strong feeling that he will prove this, to us as well as the rest of the patients.

-------------------------------------

A lady walked into a pharmacy and told the pharmacist that she needed some cyanide.

The pharmacist said, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"

The lady then explained she needed it to poison her husband.

The pharmacist's eyes got big and he said, 'I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! They'll throw both of us in jail!'

The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, 'Well, now. You didn't tell me you had a prescription.'

BEYOND VIAGRA: With Viagra such a hit, Pfizer the manufacture, is bringing forth a whole line of drugs oriented towards improving the performance of men in today's society.

DIRECTRA: A dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car trips caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when they got lost, compared to a control group of 0.2 percent.

PROJECTRA: Men given this experimental new drug were far more likely to actually finish a household repair project before starting a new one.

CHILDAGRA: Men taking this drug reported a sudden, overwhelming urge to perform more child-care tasks - especially cleaning up spills and "little accidents."

COMPLIMENTRA: In clinical trials, 82 percent of middle-aged men administered this drug noticed that their wives had a new hairstyle. Currently being tested to see if its effects extend to noticing new clothing.

BUYAGRA: Married and otherwise attached men reported a sudden urge to buy their sweeties expensive jewelry and gifts after talking this drug for only two days. Still to be seen: whether the drug can be continued for a period longer than your favorites store's return limit.

NEGA-VIAGRA: Has the exact opposite effect of Viagra. Currently undergoing clinical trials on sitting U.S. President.

NEGA-SPORTAGRA: This drug had the strange effect of making men want to turn off televised sports and actually converse with other family members.

FLATULAGRA: This complex drug converts men's noxious intestinal gases back into food solids. Special bonus: Dosage can be doubled for long car rides.

FLYAGRA: This drug has been showing great promise in treating men with O.F.D. (Open Fly Disorder). Especially useful for men on Viagra.

PRYAGRA: About to fail its clinical trial, this drug gave men in the test group an irresistible urge to dig into the personal affairs of other people. Note: Apparent overdose turned three test subjects into "special prosecutors."

LIAGRA: This drug causes men to be less than truthful when being asked about their sexual affairs. Will be available Regular, Grand Jury and Presidential Strength versions.

Surgery was often needed to make the subjects more adaptable to the driving needs of their surging onlookers. The demands put upon them meant alterations to eyes, mouth, brain, and often times teeth. The eyes, mouth and brain are quite obvious. The teeth however were the most important part of reconstruction, due to their need to reach octives and screech levels far beyond any living creatures ability. Most of the subjects that went through this laboriuos "Deconstructing of the norm" were then fitted for a special face grip.

The "Face Grip" often referred to as the "cover-up" is specially designed for those subjects who have undergone deconstruction surgery. The optics have been technologically manipulated to focus on multiple images in a singular moment. They can also take Holographic Elapsed time Memory Photos or H.E.M.P. The special breathing apparatus is built to filter out the over-bearing stench and pollution from the local area skin refineries. Often dubbed the "Skin Pond" the mask allows 98% filtration of the water supplied by the refineries, making it consumable within seconds.

Those subjects not having deconstruction surgery have had their frontal lobotomy performed often times while sleeping, with the aid of a local anesthetic of course. This procedure gives easier access for future upgrades to the minds eye and brain stem manipulation. Speech is the only function lost in this procedure so the mouth is sewn shut and a "Vocalator Collar" is permantly affixed. Although unsure of which subjects of the M.D.M.I were successfully released back into society, it remains a common practice in some underground arenas to test the limits of deconstruction surgery and thresholds of pain on the future Dominatriarchs of rythm, percussion and vocalization.

Stupidity, from the day Ruth turned around to look at Sodom to George Bush (The Lesser) running the "most powerful nation on earth," has been the real force that has run the world up from the ground, and back into the ground, time and time again.

The Hall Wall of Fame Shame will closely study the evolution(?) and importance of stupidity.

Welcome to the Mad Dog Mental Institution's Stupidology 101.

Definitions:

1) System in Natural Stupidity (SINS): A system which does not have the capacity to read, store, interpret, or apply information about its environment (e.g. three rocks on the ground or Administrators)

2) System Organized Stupidly (SOS): A system which lack the abiliby to reflect on its own behavior with respect to the environment and its own trends (e.g. a girlfriend or Language Art Department).

3) Artificially Stupid System (ASS): A system that possesses the technical capacities to know and understand itself but fails to use them (e.g. a College).

Gustave Flaubert once noted that "to be stupid and selfish and to have good health are the three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, the others are useless." Of course Flaubert was expelled from elementary school and failed his law exams, so it's possible he wasn't the carrying brightest torch in the night rally. He also managed to get several cases of venereal disease and died in a welter of financial difficulties.

And he's a literary hero.

The Hall Wall of Fame Shame will explore the proposition that everyone else is big, stupid, idiot. We will go on to test the proposal that it is we tortured few who are the only smart ones, and that our intelligence is actually a curse. If people are so freaking stupid, how can mankind survive? Surprisingly, it may be that stupidity is an evolutionary positive.

If it could get hairy people dressed in mastodon-hide frocks our of their caves and into patent-leather loafers and cheeseburgers, it certainly had something going on.

Fortunately, an institution of higher education is an excellent place to investigate stupidity, for unlimited tenure permits unlimited stupidity.

If you came to learn about stupidity, the Mad Dog Mental Institution is the place!

I. People Are Stupid

a. You are stupid

b. I am stupid

c. Everybody else is stupid

II. There are two types of (stupid) people:

a. Those who are aware of the fact that People Are Stupid

b. Those who are oblivious to this fact

III. Those who are aware of Stupidity have an advantage

a. They can more effectively deal with the stupidity of others b. They can be on guard against their own stupidity

IV. Everyone should be understanding of the stupidity of others

a. Since I am stupid, I should forgive others who are stupid

b. Because Stupidity is a part of the human condition, it cannot be helped

Unfortunately, not every experiment we do at the Mad Dog Mental Institution is successful.

Even Codename: SONIC VOODOO has less than a perfect record (i.e. "that dude with a cane").

Following is clearly the most spectacular of M.D.M.I.'s failed experiments, conducted according to a theory so diabolical and extreme that it was always doomed to failure.

Full public disclosure by M.D.M.I. was required by various United Federation of Planets treaties and terms of conditions, so the following information is one giant mouth wash with soap. . . for us.

Name : John Lansden
E-mail : jpltaz@houston.rr.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Bob is my brother-in-law what do thunk. Anyhow Im still trying to get out of the Matrix, and Scotty wont beam me up, so Im stuck here for a little while. Bigfoot is alive and well and those alien abuctions have really messed up my ability to sleep.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : Yes
Do you remember your lobotomy? : Yes
What is 42? : I lost my Hitchikers guide
Did you take your medication? : No

Name : John
E-mail : devldog0331@sbcglobal.net
Homepage : thumbzilla.com
What is your mental condition? : sexually castrated and heavily sedated
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : only the breast and thighs
Do you remember your lobotomy? : no but i liked my prostate exam
What is 42? : throw in some DD and its heaven
Did you take your medication? : only while at work

Name : kissmydonkey
E-mail : vesamacoola
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? :
Did you try the fried BioChicken? :
Do you remember your lobotomy? :
What is 42? :
Did you take your medication? :

Name : christy
E-mail : krispykristex@sbcglobal.net
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : very unstable demnted housewife.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : yes
Do you remember your lobotomy? : asual
What is 42? :
Did you take your medication? : never

Name : Ashley Summers
E-mail : viva_la_bam@comcast.net
Homepage : WAT?
What is your mental condition? : Hey! Its Ashley. Just wanting to say HI. BYE!
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : NO
Do you remember your lobotomy? : NO
What is 42? : A #
Did you take your medication? : NO I NEVER WILL

Name : David Wright
E-mail : summers3435@comcast.net
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Hey darrel its David all of us say hi back in michigan. Your website is very good, we should be coming down in the summer. Candace and her fiancee are moving to Texas near Houston.Tell your dad and Debbie we miss them as well as yourself. The Lions are better than the Texans We have Garcia who is moble and can throw, we have the williams at wideout and Rogers is healthy. Are defensive line is great and we are looking to sign Ty Law!
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : yea it was finger licken
Do you remember your lobotomy? : no
What is 42? : a number
Did you take your medication? : no

Name : DARLA-KAY
E-mail :
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : BEING AWAKE
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : YES I HAVE
Do you remember your lobotomy? : NO
What is 42? : MY AGE THIS YEAR
Did you take your medication? : YES

Name : IP Freely
E-mail : your@mom.com
Homepage : www.buttjuice.com
What is your mental condition? : Im a full blown tard!~!
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : Yes, it gave me wet poop!
Do you remember your lobotomy? : No but I do remember my addadicktome
What is 42? : The length of my pecker after my addadicktome
Did you take your medication? : yes, rectally

Name : Beths vagina
E-mail : bitchenbeth@yahoo.com
Homepage : http://www.bighole.com
What is your mental condition? : worn out and itchy, with a slight case of odorific discharge
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : no but I smell like a rotten one (and taste like it, too!)
Do you remember your lobotomy? : how about a vaginectomy instead?
What is 42? : the number of Beths customers serviced last night
Did you take your medication? : Yes, penicillin...does crack count, too?

Name : Beth
E-mail : bitchenbeth@yahoo.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Your music sucks. I know for a fact that I will not see you on the music circuit. My advise for you is not to waste anymore of your money on recording music. Why in the Hell would you write a song Named biochicken. Please do the world a favor and no more
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : HELL NO
Do you remember your lobotomy? : Your dumb
What is 42? : not you!
Did you take your medication? : I think that you need to lay off the drugs!

Name : Elvis
E-mail :
Homepage : elvis.com
What is your mental condition? : uh huh huh yeah yeah Im all shook up
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : yessir thank you than you very much
Do you remember your lobotomy? : nah Elvis dont like docters
What is 42? : not my best age
Did you take your medication? : uh huh huh yeah yeah in the bathroom

Name : PRINCESS LEAH
E-mail : leahmike2003@yahoo.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : TRYING GET A HOLD OF YOU
Did you try the fried BioChicken? :
Do you remember your lobotomy? :
What is 42? :
Did you take your medication? :

Name : Darla
E-mail : dbuckles@swbell.net
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : WOW D. I told ya Id look!!!
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : delish!!!
Do you remember your lobotomy? : ouch~~~
What is 42? : WHO?
Did you take your medication? :

Name : Daryl Putnam
E-mail : daryl_putnam@hotmail.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Terminal Gonzo-itis
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : I just snacked on the glowing fries. Those WERE fires, right?
Do you remember your lobotomy? : No, but chicks dig the scars.
What is 42? : The meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything....duh!
Did you take your medication? : Saving it for a rainy day

Name : The Authorities
E-mail : theman@theauthorities.com
Homepage : www.theman.gov
What is your mental condition? : We ask the questions, we are The Authorities! Do you have a current license registration to run a mental institution? You are renegade scum, and we, The Man, are NEVER going to stop hunting you down! DO YOU HEAR ME, MAD DOG?!! We are still looking for you
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : It was our project to begin with! Give it back!
Do you remember your lobotomy? : You will all get lobotomies when we catch you!
What is 42? : You are compromising intergalactic trade relations by divulging this information! Charges of cosmic conspiracy charges will be sought at your Nebula IV galactic trial phase.
Did you take your medication? : You will take your medication every day, 7 times per day, after we catch you!

Name : Clark Faol Cumbo
E-mail : sonofsommerled@hotmail.com
Homepage : www.sonicvoodoo.tk
What is your mental condition? : Slightly insane due to one too many experimental drugs brought on by the eternal search for personal wellbeing in a nuclear society that just can freakin ROCK!!!
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : Is that what that was?
Do you remember your lobotomy? : Id rather have a bottle in front of me than......................
What is 42? : The magical number that is the key to unlocking the universe.
Did you take your medication? : Wwhat time is it? Which medication? Oh hell, Ill just take them all....Mwaahhahhahhahahahaha

Name : Sharkbait
E-mail : sharkbait9087@hotmail.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : waiting to be eatin by a great white boing dooya honicqoi
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : taste like algae
Do you remember your lobotomy? : like it was yesturday
What is 42? : 40 + 2
Did you take your medication? : they ran out before it was my turn so the voices in my head keep telling me to do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it!

Name : john jarvis
E-mail : jarvisservices@yahoo.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : warped and twisted a little stoned
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : not yet
Do you remember your lobotomy? : yeah car surfing on mg benz taillights
What is 42? : too damn close
Did you take your medication? : let me light it up

Name : JoelAHall
E-mail : JoelALuck@AOL
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Need Help IM Hollie Halls Mom.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : A bucket of Original and Crispy
Do you remember your lobotomy? : it was most benificial
What is 42? : Two too Many
Did you take your medication? : I must , as I told you before, Im Hollies Mom.

Name : JoelAHall
E-mail :
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? :
Did you try the fried BioChicken? :
Do you remember your lobotomy? :
What is 42? :
Did you take your medication? :

Name : Dawn&John Jarvis
E-mail : dawnjarvis747@msn.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Some would say that we are an insane couple that has known of Darrells, Seans, and Jims conditions for a very long time.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : Not Yet
Do you remember your lobotomy? : No, not at all.
What is 42? : a number, HAA HEEE!!!
Did you take your medication? : Nope, dont believe in it.

Name : aaron Birdsong
E-mail :
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : very unstable...Used to be your neighbor....in a weird blue house in pioneer trails...yeah..
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : sure why not
Do you remember your lobotomy? : of corse not...
What is 42? : darrels age haha
Did you take your medication? : never

Name : aaron
E-mail :
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : very unstable
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : sure why not
Do you remember your lobotomy? : of corse not...
What is 42? : darrels age haha
Did you take your medication? : never

Name : Tim Barrett
E-mail : tbarr29@bellsouth.net
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Warped!
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : NO
Do you remember your lobotomy? : What Labotomy?
What is 42? : 24 backwards?
Did you take your medication? : ya

Name : Hollie Hall
E-mail : hmhrmt@aol.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : 2o%paranoid (have made remarkable 20%ADD progress) 20%psycho 20%schizo 8%sugar 8% spice
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : yes
Do you remember your lobotomy? : yes
What is 42? : Average IQ of Sv subjects
Did you take your medication? : twice already

Name : Big Al
E-mail : it is a secret...SHHHH!!!
Homepage : http://www.candypost.com/
What is your mental condition? : Roses are red - violets are blue - Im schizophrenic - and so am I
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : Only after it crossed the road
Do you remember your lobotomy? : Loboto My? My finger in the socket, nose smells rain, hair on fire, ears in pain
What is 42? : The sum of magical numbers in the kingdom of the blue poker playing iguanas
Did you take your medication? : Yep, can I have more???

Name : Robin
E-mail : cindyloowhokc@aol.com
Homepage : n/a
What is your mental condition? : I like warm goat milk enimas. My boyfriend plays in Sonic Voodoo in Kansas City. sonicvoodoo.tk if you are curouis. Let the insanity spread.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : no, I already ate
Do you remember your lobotomy? : yeah, that hurt
What is 42? : not my bust size
Did you take your medication? : always

Name : Hash Head
E-mail : jamess@jadecom.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : I lost my mind while looking at the end of a pin smookeing under a glass and and went on a trip with mutanuts in space at warp speed and chash landed on the 3rd plant from the sun and the land oh hash and honey.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : yes
Do you remember your lobotomy? : no
What is 42? : no
Did you take your medication? : all the time

Name : Cheryl Gotta Lotta
E-mail : cp77@ev1.net
Homepage : Gotta lotta nuttin
What is your mental condition? : Gotta lotta nuttin weighing me down so my head weighs 40 pounds. I keep excercising the ass-o-mundos yet I see it still grows....A little of a lot of this that and other.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : I was wondering why he was so dark! Fried huh?
Do you remember your lobotomy? : Yeah but I left it in the elevator
What is 42? : A magical number to all elves and leprechauns
Did you take your medication? : I thought I forgot so I took it again after I had forgotten the second time. Thats when the hospital stuck a tube in my throat and found out it was the 5th time after all. Yippe yai ai!!

Name : Melody Toonst
E-mail :
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : bordering sanity
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : always
Do you remember your lobotomy? : of course
What is 42? : my boob size
Did you take your medication? : double dosed

Name : fishboy
E-mail : fish8it@aol.com
Homepage : in the works
What is your mental condition? : medium rare: unstable at times rare: very unstable at other times well done: over cooked on occasion
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : the tube on my I.V. was too small
Do you remember your lobotomy? : there was one?
What is 42? : The year the Germans bombed Peal Harbor.
Did you take your medication? : yes as well as other the other patients medication so I could feel their pain.

Name : eddie garcia jr
E-mail : aiyiy4@aol.com
Homepage : www.jbbullion.com
What is your mental condition? : Apparently not as screwed up as you Mr.Jungle Bob!How much ectasy do you guys take as teenagers? I havnt read so much bullshit since I read Mein Kampf!
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : Ive eaten Bayou Chicken
Do you remember your lobotomy? : got to have a brain first
What is 42? : 24 backwards
Did you take your medication? : I will now!

Name : JohnnyDanger
E-mail : jgarcia408@speakeasy.net
Homepage : pssss...its a secret for now
What is your mental condition? : on the brink of insanity, but the voices in my head are damn near pushing me over the edge!!
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : damn near burned a hole in my throat
Do you remember your lobotomy? : Succesful or unsuccesful?
What is 42? : 24 backwards
Did you take your medication? : all rx from the doc, and some that werent

Name : spot778
E-mail : phil.vollmer@can.xerox.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : angry with continuinty breaks
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : I think it laid a bioegg
Do you remember your lobotomy? : the what now ?
What is 42? : six eights
Did you take your medication? : religously

Name : TheGMan
E-mail : thegman@futuredude.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : I have been stricken with a severe case of gottasmokealottabuditis-420. It requires constant high doses of medication of which the evil empire forbids us access.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : I ate it raw. I hate fried food!
Do you remember your lobotomy? : Buzzzz....whirrrrr....click...clickk
What is 42? : ...uhhh...you forgot the 0 at the end dahh.
Did you take your medication? : Administered daily in several un-metered, and un-controlled doses. Do you smell something burning?

Name : TINA
E-mail :
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Let me put it this way, if anyone asks you havent seen us.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : Not yet, but soon, very soon!
Do you remember your lobotomy? : Cant say ive had one, atleast not that I know of.
What is 42? : A number before 43 and after 41
Did you take your medication? : Yes, the little voices remind me to take them

Name : Paul
E-mail : pbryan@innovaelec.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : uh
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : I ate it all
Do you remember your lobotomy? : What
What is 42? : My age in 2 years
Did you take your medication? : The dog ate it

Name : HOLLY
E-mail : holly@futuredude.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Maryjamushroohashishism
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : Sure did! I preferred the BREAST meat. It was so juicy and tasty and finger lickin mmmmmmmm goood!
Do you remember your lobotomy? : When did I have a lobotomy???
What is 42? : The answer to QUESTION, of coarse!
Did you take your medication? : Lightin it up right now! Thanks for the reminder!! PEACE

Name : Steve aka FUBAR
E-mail : spalmer42000@yahoo.com
Homepage : www.worldsex.com
What is your mental condition? : F.U.B.A.R.
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : man thats good shit!
Do you remember your lobotomy? : not to sure?
What is 42? : ideal breast size
Did you take your medication? : morning noon and night

Name : J. Micropain
E-mail : rabidrecords@sonicvoodoo.com
Homepage : www.sonicvoodoo.com
What is your mental condition? : Psychodelic Hypnosism with an acute case of Siphonaptera
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : I prefer it raw
Do you remember your lobotomy? : No, but I remember yours
What is 42? : Strength of mind that enables a person to encounter danger or bear pain or adversity with courage
Did you take your medication? : As often as possible

Name : P.J.
E-mail : pj@sonicvoodoo.com
Homepage :
What is your mental condition? : Dimentia -
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : What was that you like your women like you like your chicken with a little bit of fat on the end...
Do you remember your lobotomy? : See mental condition
What is 42? : ?????
Did you take your medication? : What medication - see mental condition

Name : Brett The Master Herring
E-mail : brett.herring@expeditors.com
URL :
What is your mental condition? : Condition critical
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : Whatever
Do you remember your lobotomy? : What?
What is 42? : My Penis
Did you take your medication? : No

Name : the bub
E-mail : barbalicious@sbcglobal.net
URL :
What is your mental condition? : bi-polar
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : yes
Do you remember your lobotomy? : yes
What is 42? : ultimate answer to the universe
Did you take your medication? : yes

Name : becalecahi
E-mail : becalecahi@sonicvoodoo.com
URL : www.sonicvoodoo.com
What is your mental condition? : Misanthropic keratosis- hatred of mankind accompanied by an area of skin marked with horny tissue
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : I got the McNoggin. Very chewy. Wondering why there isnt an all beak option.
Do you remember your lobotomy? : Seems like so long ago... lots of bunnies... maybe some chocolate ice cream
What is 42? : 23
Did you take your medication? : some of it, some of yours

Name : Matt Cassidy (Case Humper)
E-mail : matt@texascassidys.com
URL : www.texascassidys.com
What is your mental condition? : I have currently been fitted for a special soft helmet that also has a wonderful spit cup in front. The ear portion has extra padding for protection from myself during my psychotic fitzzz!!
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : mmm..tastes like chicken
Do you remember your lobotomy? : i got a bottle in front of me
What is 42? : 1/8 more than 41 7/8
Did you take your medication? : fred and wilma yummy yummy

Name : mad dog
E-mail : rabidrecords@sonicvoodoo.com
URL : www.sonicvoodoo.com
What is your mental condition? : mad - and mad dog hate nazis
Did you try the fried BioChicken? : yes - mad dog like
Do you remember your lobotomy? : what lobotomy?
What is 42? : good question
Did you take your medication? : of course

Update 07 December 2003 - Mad Scientist / Witch Doctor
Basic tracks are completed for PROJECT: FOUR TRACK MIND. Codename: SONIC VOODOO estimates 85% of the experiments are finalized, with screams, dementia, stunt bass, masturbatory six-string manipulations, and polyrythmic acitate currently being finalized.
Biochicken is now being served in the lunchroom with Sugarfixxx for a desert.

Update 20 March 2004 - Mad Scientist / Witch Doctor
Cerebral data transfer is currently 98.3781% finalized to the cross dimensional test phase. Final mixing and vortex approval results will be implemented within the coming weeks. Frontal presentation of PROJECT: FOUR TRACK MIND by WickedToe has been completed (greatly appreciated by Sonic Voodoo/M.D.M.I.!). Interior Dimensional Manipulation [IDM] techniques are currently under construction by Enemy Ace (a secret operative of M.D.M.I. shhhhhhh!!!!). Possible reality warp field tests for additional IDM results are being conducted by F.i.S.H.
Please visit the lunchroom for some delicious baked-almond Biochicken casserole washed down with some homemade Swampbuzz herbal tea.

Update 09 April 2004 - Mad Scientist / Witch Doctor
Test phase sequencing of recorded sub-nucleonic DNA has been finalized for the following experiments:
BIOCHICKEN, FIRST PANCAKE, FOUR BANGER, SUGARFIXXX, MICROPAIN, THONG BIKINIS.
Template formulation with creative proton crystals are being prepared for conditional chaos manipulation for the SWAMPBUZZ experiment. Elite mercenaries and international bounty hunters have been contracted to capture a renegade test subject in order to complete the experimentation of INCEPTION and BIGGIWELL. Critical analysis of test results will begin soon as final mixdown of vortex transfer information is calculated and confirmed.
Today's Lunchroom Special: Snot Dogs with Notcho' Cheez!

Update 25 September - Mad Scientist / Witch Doctor
Final Mix Phase entered. Approximately 59.19382% completion of test results confirmed ready for mass productions and crass commercialization techniques. Cross-confirmation analysis of finalized test results will commence within the coming weeks. Public comsumption release date to be announced very soon. Stay tuned for further updates...or don't.
Today's Lunchroom Special: Jester Micropaine's special recipe pork roast and hot mayonaise eggrolls

ROOM 7

the room 7 EXPERIMENT WAS INITIATED TO DIVERT AND CONTAIN AN ELEMENT OF THE PSYCHO-DIMENSIONAL REALITY (PDR) CREATED IN WISCONSIN DURING THE EXTENSIVE TESTING OF TURBO CHARGED, OVERDRIVEN AMPLIFIERS ASPIRING TO TAP INTO THE UNIVERAL "MIND" (see CODENAME: SONIC VOODOO HISTORY for additional information).

DURING THE SHUTDOWN OF MUCHO VOIDUS, A JANITOR ACCIDENTLY SPILLED PIN-SOL BRAND DISINFECTANT AND CLEANER INTO THE PDR, WHICH STARTED A CHAIN REACTION OF BIONUCLEAR FLATULANCE PROPORTIONS. THE ESCAPING TOXIC FUMES ARE BELIEVED TO HAVE INFECTED A NOMANDIC TRIBE OF WILD HIPPIES IN EASTERN TEXAS. MDMI CAPTURED ALMOST ALL OF THE VICTIMS OF THE NOXIOUS VAPORS, BUT IT WAS UNKNOWN AT THE TIME THAT NOT ALL OF THE MUTATED CREATURES WERE HUMAN.

SEVERAL INCIDENTS INVOLVING PET STORES BEING ATTACKED BY MOLOTOV COCKTAILS OCCURRED AND WRITTEN DEMANDS TO "FREE THE BEASTS FROM TNE BONDAGE OF PET SLAVERY" WERE FOUND AT EACH SIGHT. THE FBI EVENTUALLY CAPTURED A FELINE OPERATIVE THAT SHOWED OBVIOUS SIGNS OF MUTATION FROM BEING EXPOSED TO THE MUCHO VOIDUS TOXIC VAPORS. UNABLE TO CONTAIN THE RENEGADE KITTY, THE GOVERNMENT PROVIDED FUNDING FOR THE MDMI TO CONSTRUCT ROOM 7 TO BOTH STUDY THE CREATURE AND TO ENSURE THAT IT WOULD NOT ESCAPE.

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pharmacological therapy

"I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal labotomy." Fred Allen.

New Drugs for Women

NURSE RATCHED

Medical Developments For Men

"I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs or insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me."Hunter S. Thompson

Public Health Notice:

THE WHITE ROOM

"Is it weird in here, or is it just me?"~ Steven Wright

"I have voices in my head, but they're all speaking Spanish, and I have NO idea what they're saying."~ Daniel Tosh

THE BLACK ROOM

"My psychiatrist told me I was crazyand I said I want a second opinion.He said okay, you're ugly too."

take your medication

therapy

surgery

face grip

lobotomy

Welcome to outpatient sessions for stupidology 101

SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE THAT HUMANS ARE INDEED IDIOTS.Your professors:

ALBERT EINSTEIN

Theoretical Physicist, widely acknowledged to be one of the greatest physicists of all time. Einstein is known for developing the theory of relativity, but he also made important contributions to the development of the theory of quantum mechanics.

frank zappa

American singer-songwriter, innovative rock guitarist, modernist composer, multi-instrumentalist, satirist, film-maker, and bandleader

chris rock

American stand-up comedian, actor, writer, producer and director

john wayne

American actor and filmmaker

george carlin

American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic, and author

Konrad Adenauer

German statesman who served as the first Chancellor of the Federal Republic of Germany from 1949 to 1963

will rogers

American stage and film actor, vaudeville performer, cowboy, humorist, newspaper columnist, and social commentator

STUPIDOLOGY: A STUDY IN SELF-AWARENESS

Much is written about intelligence quotients, artificial intelligence, even increasing our intelligence... Overlooked in all of this is a far more important human characteristic, stupidity.

THEORY OF STUPIDITY

CV

MALE / FEMALE COMPARATIVE ANALYSIS:

MARRIAGE BEFORE

_______________________________

MARRIAGE AFTER

_______________________________

THE MALE BRAIN

_______________________________

THE FEMALE BRAIN

_______________________________

Scientification VisualizationNucleonitc Scan of the Masculine Thinking Device______________________________________

Mechanical Implementation of the DifferentiationMasculinization Comparitivization Feminization______________________________________

Egineering Explanation of the DifferentiationMasculinization Comparitivization Feminization______________________________________

WILD KINGDOM OBSERVATIONISM

"Insanity is super sanity. The normal is psychotic. Normal means lack of imagination, lack of creativity."Jean Dubuffet

trust me here

THE LAND OF FAILED EXPERIMENTS

Cletus the Fetus

Cletus Cletus Cletus is the M.D.M.I.'s only tragically failed experiment with DNA cloning when they unsuccessfully attempted to duplicate Double Barrel. Research has revealed that the cause was an extremely toxic water supply in the test subjects living environment.

Cletus Jr., Enis & Rebel

Granny Cletus

Bertha Cletus (Cletus Cletus' mother/aunt) lives with Hank Cletus in a double-wide trailer. She smells real bad. She likes to hang out in bars and drink beer. Granny has sores all over. The flies are terrible.

Pappy Cletus

Cletus is the father/brother of Cletus Cletus and lives under the Cletus family trailer. Granny Cletus is teaching him how to use toilet paper.

Hank

Hank Cletus is the older brother/cousin of Cletus the Fetus. He is in jail right now. When he gets out he is not allowed to be around small animals and kitchen appliances.

Billy

Billy Cletus is the younger brother/uncle of Cletus the Fetus and he holds the park record. He once jumped over 7 trailers. Billy crashed alot and talks real slow now. His doctor told him to wear a helmet.

Sue Ellen

Sue Ellen Cletus is the younger sister/aunt of Cletus the Fetus. She has 15 kids and they all look different. She has a disease that makes her itch.

Barney

Barney Cletus is the older brother/uncle/cousin of Cletus the Fetus and is the pride of the Cletus Family. He is 42. He wants to be a Doctor and can write his own name.

Marky

Marky Cletus (Cletus Cletus' brother/nephew) is still having problems. He doesn't know what he wants in life anymore. He believes that he is a decorated war hero and now sells perfume at a department store.

Goober

Goober Cletus, the cousin/nephew of Cletus the Fetus, runs a tomato stand down by the highway. He once went 53 days without taking a bath.

Boomer

Boomer Cletus, the cousin/nephew of Cletus the Fetus, is going to be a policeman one day. He already patrols the interstate and stops the bad people.

Eddie

Eddie Cletus, the half-cousin/nephew of Cletus the Fetus, is going to be a dentist some day. He does all the work on the Cletus family teeth.

Slim

Slim Cletus, the second-cousin/uncle of Cletus the Fetus, is the star of the Cletus family tree. After his sex change operation, he moved to Paris, France and became the star attraction at the Pink Pistol Palace, the biggest gay rodeo caberet show in western Europe.

Whinonna

Whinonna Cletus, the sister/neice of Cletus Cletus (aunt/cousin of Cletus the Fetus), likes to light her flatulance with her Zippo at parties and she hangs out at truck stops. Boomer says she is the best lot lizard on Interstate 10.

"I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal labotomy."
Fred Allen.

"I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs or insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me."
Hunter S. Thompson

"Is it weird in here,
or is it just me?"
~ Steven Wright

"I have voices in my head, but they're all speaking Spanish, and I have NO idea what they're saying."
~ Daniel Tosh

"My psychiatrist told me I was crazy
and I said I want a second opinion.
He said okay, you're ugly too."

SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE THAT HUMANS ARE INDEED IDIOTS.

Your professors:

Scientification Visualization
Nucleonitc Scan of the Masculine Thinking Device
______________________________________

Mechanical Implementation
of the Differentiation
Masculinization Comparitivization Feminization
______________________________________

Egineering Explanation of the Differentiation
Masculinization Comparitivization Feminization
______________________________________

"Insanity is super sanity.
The normal is psychotic.
Normal means lack of imagination,
lack of creativity."
Jean Dubuffet

Visitors are not welcomed,
but they can be tasty.

aka Cletus the Fetus.
He only agreed to allow the public disclosure of the results of the failed Stinkadena experiments if we posted his picture twice.

So here it is.

Codename: SONIC VOODOO

Guestbook Archive

Project: four track mind updates

imported from old website

"There is a fine line between genius and insanity.
I have erased this line."
Oscar Levant